12 replies to this topic

[CedarRapids]

I picked this forum to initiate this discussion. I have no pictures, so I'll write a thousand or so words instead:

The proposal is in about 6 months. It will be a surprise with an engagement ring of my choice after good discussion to date of what she would like.

We last agreed to do alternating gemstones and diamonds in her band. I will probabaly have a simple and 'standard' platinum ring.

What are your thoughts about wedding bands being exceptionally dissimilar? On one hand, I kind of feel that they should be similar in style (i.e., I would "move" the gemstones to the band of the engagement ring) to symbolize our union. On the other other hand, there is something more individualistic about each of us having our own style expressed in the band. We have each appreciated the retention of our individualism throughout our relationship and that is unlikley to change.

Your thoughts are welcome. I'd like to be armed with inspiration and I'm open-minded.

Edited by CedarRapids, 19 August 2011 - 08:15 PM.

[davidelevi]

Disclaimer: I come from a part of the world where the concept of "wedding set" does not exist. People wear a plain design wedding ring - if they do - and if they like to add their engagement ring or anything else, it's unlikely to match and nobody minds.

However, since you are planning for a set, you may as well make it a set, though not necessarily in an obvious way. What about a surprise emerald (or emeralds)? As in these (replace yellow diamonds with emeralds, in yellow or white metal as you prefer)



or this



or this - which is truly "secret" rather than just "surprise"



Some caution is needed with designing the metalwork in the last design to make sure the green from the emerald does not leach through in the main stone above.

[LaurieH]

My opinion, not as an "expert" but as a girl--it's not a matter of matching the band to the engagement ring--it's do they compliment each other to where they don't look awkward next to one another. And as far as husband/wife matching--heck no. Do it if you want, but more importantly, do WHAT you want. You have to wear that ring--presumably--every day for the rest of your lives. You have to like what you're going to look at. It needs to be comfortable for you and something that feels like YOU. You mentioned you're both independent people who just happen to really like hanging out, ya know, FOREVER, but that you don't really push each other to like the stuff you each like yourselves: why should that be any different for your rings?

Now, as far as the suggestions that Davide made--I'm all for that *IF* it can be done in a way to where whatever band that you do choose won't damage the stone or setting (rings do wear against each other after time if you don't have them soldered together) over time. There is also the option of "hiding" an emerald on the INSIDE of her engagement ring, or your band. I believe Tacori does this for all their rings (not an emerald, but a diamond), and I kinda dig the hidden diamond thing. There's another designer that does a tiny hidden ruby on all their jewelry (I can't remember the name now...d'oh!). It's kind of the same idea as having inscriptions on your ring--it's something that only the wearer and giver know about, so it's something special.

[denverappraiser]

To me it's ENTIRELY a personal choice. That said, I do have an issue you may not have considered. The rings move on her finger as she wears them and they can damage each other at the contact points. Usually 'sets' are designed to minimize this movement or at least to have the points that touch be areas that aren't so subject to wear. If you're going to wear 2 dissimilar rings, make sure that they either fit together in a way that works mechanically or solder them together at the back to avoid the wear.

[CedarRapids]

Thanks for your responses! I was actually asking about matching her and my wedding bands. Her engagement ring and wedding band probably won't match and we've looked at combinations in which gemstones dont interfere with one another. I was thinking to move the emeralds on her wedding band (after asking her first) to the engagement ring so that our wedding bands are similiar. That got me thinking about the symbolism of similar wedding bands vs. Dissimilar ones to represent our individuality.

[CedarRapids]

I'm finally at a desktop computer to see these images properly.

davidelevi, on 17 August 2011 - 10:53 PM, said:

This one I like a lot. Davide, is this one of your settings?

Of course, I like the one that requires the most caution (with design). Symbolic.

Edited by CedarRapids, 19 August 2011 - 08:13 PM.

[CedarRapids]

LaurieH, on 18 August 2011 - 05:31 AM, said:

My opinion, not as an "expert" but as a girl--it's not a matter of matching the band to the engagement ring--it's do they compliment each other to where they don't look awkward next to one another. And as far as husband/wife matching--heck no. Do it if you want, but more importantly, do WHAT you want. You have to wear that ring--presumably--every day for the rest of your lives. You have to like what you're going to look at. It needs to be comfortable for you and something that feels like YOU. You mentioned you're both independent people who just happen to really like hanging out, ya know, FOREVER, but that you don't really push each other to like the stuff you each like yourselves: why should that be any different for your rings?

This all sounds good. It was our thinking months ago. Left unsupervised, I enjoy meandering through alternative ideas. Thanks for steering me back in.

LaurieH, on 18 August 2011 - 05:31 AM, said:

There is also the option of "hiding" an emerald on the INSIDE of her engagement ring, or your band. I believe Tacori does this for all their rings (not an emerald, but a diamond), and I kinda dig the hidden diamond thing. There's another designer that does a tiny hidden ruby on all their jewelry (I can't remember the name now...d'oh!). It's kind of the same idea as having inscriptions on your ring--it's something that only the wearer and giver know about, so it's something special.

I'm digging this, too. This other designer, does hidden mean truly hidden or simply not visible when worn (like Davide's pic).

Many thanks

Edited by CedarRapids, 19 August 2011 - 08:14 PM.

[CedarRapids]

OK. Just found Mark Morrell's nested crown setting online.

[davidelevi]

You got there before I could post. The one I posted above is a Mark Morrell design, but we have made similar rings (at least one with a sapphire under a light blue diamond IIRC), and I am trying to find photos. Will post if/when I find!

[CedarRapids]

Thank you, Davide. I look forward to seeing your photos.

Edited by CedarRapids, 19 August 2011 - 08:16 PM.

[davidelevi]

Bummer. Cannot find the photos - it was a couple of years ago and they have been buried somewhere. Sorry.

[LaurieH]

Look for something else. That's the best way to find anything

[davidelevi]

I've tried them all - I know it was posted on another forum, but I can't locate it. Grrr....