24 replies to this topic

[Feydakin]

Jay - my response was to your last comment :

Quote

As for me, I think of myself as a financially-responsible person. How do you see yourself?

You laid that out there in such a way as to make yours the right answer and any other answer to be wrong.. As for all the other stuff, we just happen to disagree on how to finiance our lives.. I'm a huge fan of using other people's money whenever possible..

I could have paid cash for our last car, but I got the loan at 2%.. The money I left in our investments instead of pulling it out to buy a car earned us 14% last year.. The way I see it I'm up 12% on my money.. The same for credit cards.. Theywant to give me a 0% interest card, I'll be more than thrilled to use it while my money does other things..

The problem isn't in the disagreement on how and what to spend money on, but in the agressive tone your post took when you did disagree.. I would never buy a piece of jewelry.. Seriously.. I don't even wear a wedding band.. But I have more cars and motorcycles than I probably need.. Everyone's priorities are different, and everyone's desires are different.. And to chastise someone because they are differnt than you is simply uncalled for..

[Jay Gatsby]

Feydakin, on Wednesday, Mar 1 2006, 11:45 AM, said:

Jay - my response was to your last comment :

Quote

As for me, I think of myself as a financially-responsible person. How do you see yourself?

You laid that out there in such a way as to make yours the right answer and any other answer to be wrong.. As for all the other stuff, we just happen to disagree on how to finiance our lives.. I'm a huge fan of using other people's money whenever possible..

I could have paid cash for our last car, but I got the loan at 2%.. The money I left in our investments instead of pulling it out to buy a car earned us 14% last year.. The way I see it I'm up 12% on my money.. The same for credit cards.. Theywant to give me a 0% interest card, I'll be more than thrilled to use it while my money does other things..

The problem isn't in the disagreement on how and what to spend money on, but in the agressive tone your post took when you did disagree.. I would never buy a piece of jewelry.. Seriously.. I don't even wear a wedding band.. But I have more cars and motorcycles than I probably need.. Everyone's priorities are different, and everyone's desires are different.. And to chastise someone because they are differnt than you is simply uncalled for..

Ah, now I understand. I thought you were referring to my comment about horses, rather than f0rbidden.

As for my comment, it did not, in fact, lay out mine as the right answer. Do you believe that someone is financially-responsible if they buy something they can't afford? In your case, it's great that you use OPM (other people's money) to purchase things, even though you could pay cash. In that regard, I completely agree (see one of my earlier posts). HOWEVER, it is a financially irresponsible mistake to buy something when you don't have the cash to cover it.

Most people don't consider the consequences of their financial decisions. They want lots of shiny things or the latest electronic toys, and they don't see the problem with buying it on credit. They want it NOW, rather than later when they can afford it.

Chastising is in the eye of the beholder. Usually the one who takes offense sees it as chastising, while the other is merely asking a question -- which is exactly what I did in the first place. From there, what I thought to be a solid discussion about jewelry financing (and financial responsibility in general) degenerated into an ad hominem attack on me.

[f0rbidden]

I think I finally understand the problem.

You, Jay, thought that because we chose to purchase on layaway rather than pay in cash in full that we were buying something we couldn't afford. Maybe, along the way, in attempting to not lose my cool, I didn't explain it very well. Or maybe, what I said was misunderstood.

I agree that a diamond is a luxury item. I have children and buying anything for myself is a rare event, indeed. If you have kids, you understand where I'm coming from.

I don't see the layaway option as any different than any other type of financing. It didn't make sense to put such a purchase on a credit card, or get a loan, or take money OUT of savings or investments where the money earns interest - this was the logical choice. It isn't a matter of not wanting to wait. Sure, I could have put the money aside, and a couple of months from now, we'd have been able to purchase the same ring - which was the original plan! But I found a really beautiful diamond at a really great price, and we decided it made sense to go ahead and do it now.

We also decided not to turn the rest of our financial plan upside down in the process. We decided to stay within the budget we created , not only for the purchase, but for our household.

That all having been said, yeah, I did find your comments to be harsh and uncalled for - you don't actually know anything about my financial situation, nor could you, and so you were making snap judgements which were unnecessary. I found some of your comments came across as a personal attack, which I couldn't understand.

Maybe it's just a matter of the medium - it's hard to convey emotions in text. Sometimes what you believe is an innocent comment or question can be read by someone else who finds it offensive. Text is an unforgiving medium at best, and if you don't know the person you're writing to or whose comment you're reading, it's even more difficult.

So, can we put an end to this discussion, please.

[Jay Gatsby]

f0rbidden, on Wednesday, Mar 1 2006, 01:34 PM, said:

Maybe it's just a matter of the medium - it's hard to convey emotions in text. Sometimes what you believe is an innocent comment or question can be read by someone else who finds it offensive. Text is an unforgiving medium at best, and if you don't know the person you're writing to or whose comment you're reading, it's even more difficult.

So, can we put an end to this discussion, please.

Agreed.

P.S. You have to agree that this has been one of the liveliest threads this board has seen in quite a while.

[f0rbidden]

lol

I'm all for lively - and I have to say that most days your comments wouldn't have gotten me riled as they did, but you know ....you have to watch our for us girls sometimes